Welcome to my life journey, I will share the essence of who I am and what I live. Journey with me, on topics such as weight loss, spirituality, motherhood, relationships and anything else that elevates at the moment. I hope my triumphs, will be your triumphs. I wish that my struggles will be shared with you; together we can overcome them. My dream is to inspire others within. I now open my life to you...so it is... My journey, my way!
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Week 19!
Thursday, October 29, 2009
H1N1 Vent
I have been debating on and off whether to vaccinate my kids or not. As of right now, I'm a BIG NO!
- this vaccination has not been tested. Who's to say in a year from now there is not any complications due to the ingredients of the vaccination
- the rush into production, get it out there
- I keep thinking isn't the human body better off fighting this thing and the immune system learning to cope? Remember the penicillin backlash?
- In Canada, the vaccine has adjuvant, mercury. Maybe it has the same amount equal to a can of tuna. But, am I not injecting that into my three year old's vein?
One minute, I am "YES"...the next "NO". There is no guarantee the vaccination will even work. Why? They don't know. It hasn't been tested. Those who are getting vaccinated now; are the guinea pigs.
If this H1N1 could get any more ridiculous, it does. So my son Carmelo has been fighting a viscous cough. Like anything else, I don't believe in sending my children to school sick. I loathe those perfect attendance awards. Don't come and tell me that no child ever gets sick!? Disease is spread by contact with others. If people kept their kids home when they were sick: less chance of others getting it, and disease spreading, in my humble opinion.
Back to Carmelo. This morning he woke-up with every symptom of H1N1. Headache, vomiting, fever, lethargic (the kid peed on the bathroom floor because he thought he was at the toilet!). Of course, with all the mass panic going around. We all panicked!
We called tele-health. Do to the overwhelming flood of calls, a nurse will return my call in: 8 hours. Unbelievable.
I called the school to inquire about the absenteeism rate. They could not disclose that information to me. Just know, it is high. Any confirmed cases of H1N1? Can't disclose that either. Great! Be sure to print off 800+ letters though letting us all know there's a case of head lice in the school!!!!!
I called the pediatrician's office. Apparently, we are to treat it like any other flu. There is no swabbing, or tests to be done. Assume, it's just a flu. If he's symptoms get worse...bring him to CHEO (our ER). "What do you mean get worse?" If he has trouble breathing, or his hands and lips start to turn blue. If he's fever get's higher than 104. Thanks.
The government and health officials have been preparing for this flu pandemic since the spring...with their advertising and hand-outs. Telling us to 'be prepared'. You aren't even prepared to test those who have all the symptoms in the first place to confirm the H1N1. But, you are telling me to be prepared?! Then, when we are 'confirming' ourselves through symptoms, you then advise me to treat it like a regular 'flu'.????
Unbelievable.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Make Time Your Friend
psst...it promises less wrinkles and no need for botox :>
http://www.oprah.com/article/spirit/emotionalhealth/20091021-orig-best-aging-secret
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Humbled I am
The other day, I blogged about my foul mood as of late. The other night my neighbour came for tea. I told her how I'd been feeling lately. She too had been feeling out of sorts. The change of season really brings out the worst in all of us. However, being the wise soul she is, she quickly retorted with, 'but we are healthy, our children are too, our husband's love us...we have so much to appreciate...we must focus only on that." With that she continued...the story and I am somewhat ashamed of my pompous behaviour.
A woman we know through neighbours and family is a breast cancer survivor. She is single (her hubby left her for her best friend) and has three children. She now stays at home and babysits her grandchild. She hasn't been feeling well lately. She recently found out her cancer has returned. Her chances of survival, are not very good and her doctor has advised her to get all her affairs in order. Surgery is the best option, and if successful chemo will follow. That is a big IF due to the location of the tumour. With all this, she has asked that her surgery be postponed until after Christmas so that she can spend this time with her loved ones. The doctors agreed, surgery is booked for January 1.
She used to have it 'all', beautiful home, jewelry, fancy cars, and a house full of friends all the time. Then something changed, she got sick and the lifestyle changed. It all tumbled so quickly, even the 'friends' can hardly spare a 'hello' when they run into each other. She boasts today, that it was an illusion. Material items do not bring happiness. It is not what matters in life. Do not be fooled. All that can be gone in an instant. It is who you are and what you stand for that is lasting. A lesson she has learned well. Appreciate what you have, and don't take it for granted. She now truly appreciates what life is really about.
Throughout it all, she continues to cook for her boy's soccer team, and is at every game to cheer them on. She takes her daughter shopping. Always a smile on her face, a kiss and a warm hug to greet you. She spends her days, with her children, and grandchild. She no longer worries about cleaning, laundry, having her nails done and her hair perfect etc...instead she focuses on being, and spending as much quality time as she can.
Something we can all learn from her. That my friends is strength! This woman emanates courage and love. What an inspiration she is. I bow to her, and pray for her to beat this. Miracles do happen.
I am humbled...no more complaining for me. Life is too precious to be sitting around being angry, bitter and resentful. We must live each day to the fullest, happily with gratitude. We never know what life has to offer us, however if today was my last day, tomorrow I would regret not having lived it with joy.
I'm off to go pick-up Diodato from school as he just finished running his first 5k (So proud of you buddy! You beat Mommy to it! ...however I'll challenge his time of 41 minutes.) Then, I'm coming home to colour and read with Antonio before he is off to Oxford.
Humbled I am,
Kimmy
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Blowing-off Steam with the Shift.
Last week, I blogged about my encounter with Bruce Bonner. How my body scan showed intense levels of stress. Especially from my heart, heart chakra and emotional state. Be it, I am an emotional person. There is lot's of resentment hiding behind my gracious smile and sweet green eyes.
After pondering my scan, I realized that I am a moment away from losing my cool. I have zero patience with my children. My hubby gets snappy answers. I answer the phone like it is a mortal enemy disturbing my peace on the other line. In addition, I am a moments away from crossing the line with some who have been deserving some medicine of their own. I am short of breath. My skin is red like my energy. My eyes are throwing daggers. My body, my mind and my spirit has reached a boiling point.
You see, I have a major pet peeve with 'injustices' and 'unfairness'. I cringe at people who have superiority complexes. Sometimes, I want to just go over there and knock them down to ground level. We are all after all equals, nobody is better or above anyone. I don't understand how someone could laugh at another one's misfortune. How some feel it is okay to mistreat others or even how they treat my children. I seem to be on some type of spiritual high horse, and for that I apologize. I'm trying my best to control myself. Seems like I am being tested to and forth. I've really had enough!
I always try to take the high road. It's embedded in my spirit. I always try to stay on the side that karma will take care of things. I always listen to our brother Jesus who taught us all to turn the other cheek. The glass for me is always more than half full anyhow.
With every pound I am losing (AGAIN!), I am uncovering some deep emotional wounds. I realize more and more that as we grow older, we really start to weed out the 'good' and the 'bad' people in our lives. Most people come into our lives to help us grow along our journey. But, why do people have to torture you along the way? What is it with that?!
Why are people so mean and vindictive? Why are some some evil? Why are some people so selfish and egocentric? I just don't get it! Someone once told me that what you see in people is usually what you don't see in yourself. I disagree with my entire being and soul!
So when Bruce walked me through my scan, I had a huge 'AHA' moment. There staring me in the face were my issues, embedded deep within my body and affecting it on every cell level. What could I do? How could I heal this part of myself. Surely, I cannot go on being so angry and bitter. It goes against who I am, and who I aspire to be.
Like everything else, when you ask...the Universe comes a running. The universe will knock and knock at your door, the universe will ring the door bell and finally if nobody answers, the universe will break the door down. It's best to answer on the first knock.
The answer came in the form of a quote from Sonia Choquette: "Resentments and old angers keep you from tuning into your vibes. What must you forgive and release? It is time to take an honest look at this question don't you think?"
So I took the time and journaled my private thoughts, and my anger at certain people, situations and such. I feel better. I could have posted it all here, however I would be adding to the negativity of it all. I choose for it to stop with me, and that makes me happy. I am not in control of what other people do, how they act or how they choose to view others or things. I am in control of how I react; and that needs to be in accordance to my beliefs and my spirit.
What I do know is that the universe has its own way of shifting the balance over the course of time so that all things are ultimately fair. We can trust in this process and understand that karma actually exists. In time, there is balance.
We just have to forgive, move forth in our journey taking the lessons that are brought forth, turning the page.
So I'm releasing my anger. I'm letting go because it is not serving me. Whatever happens, happens. People make their choices and I must make mine according. The steam has been blown-off, the shift to balance and happiness begins. This is what my kids, my hubby, my true family, my genuine friends and I deserve. The universe will balance everyone else in the end, so that I don't have to.
Ah....!
Kimmy
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
Shifting Towards Balance
When our body is deficient in chromium, it takes twice as long for insulin to remove glucose from the blood. This slows down the whole sugar glucose process causing the whole body to become more reactive to every other thing that is happening within it. Chromium enhances insulin performance and glucose utilization. It also helps to carry proteins in the body. "
So I'm on supplements, and crossing my fingers. Further, this is day 2 of the supplements, and I can already feel the positive shift. In addition, my diet-nutrition is right on. I am dairy sensitive (as I suspected) and will have to make an effort to stay away from dairy. No soy either. The almond breeze as recommended by Rob is perfect.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Turkey Blues
Today, my plan was to blog about how am now feeling; twenty pounds lighter, and more active.
However, thanks to my whirlwind of a week-end, I ended up being awake all last night...sick to my stomach. Serves me right. I always promised myself that this blog would be the raw truth. As I've posted before, serves nobody including myself if I blog half-truths, and lies. Besides, I know fully more than anyone about liars, and scammers they are my pet peeves. We won't go there. Being truthful to myself and everyone is part of this wondrous journey. Life is not all perfect moments...and to share this truth with you all, makes my journey all worthwhile.
Anyhow, here is my list of what I ate this week-end....blah...I'm sick just typing it. (Oh...and Rob...if you are reading this; stop reading now! )
Saturday
- coffee
- banana
- roasted chicken
- salade
- italian wedding soup
- fried zuccini
- veal marsala
- whole wheat linguini alfredo
- 2 glasses white wine
- cafe latte
- tiramisu
Sunday
- fibre one cereal
- coffee
- rice
- assorted cold canapes & hors d'oeuvres
- french cut lamb chops
- bruschetta
- olive bread ( lot's of it!)
- prosciutto ribbon with melon
- buffalo mozzarella and tomato trio
- italian cured delicacies
- fazzoletti fiorentina with ricotta and spinach in rose sauce
- casalinga with veal and beef in tomato sauce
- baby green salad with parmesean crisp
- Chateaubriand, duchess potatoes and carrots
- lindor chocolates
- champagne
- red wine
- cranberry vodka with a splash of orange juice
- cannoli, cannoli and more cannoli
- italian and french pastries
Monday
- Fibre one cereal with almond breeze milk (off to a great start!)
- coffee
- white rice
- turkey (lot's)
- mashed potatoes (lot's)
- gravy
- stuffing
- basmati rice
- strawberry cheesecake
- strawberry cheesecake
I am stuffed! Reading through this list...no wonder I am sick! Talk about shocking your body! This is how I felt all the time, stuffed, drained and sick. My body is working overtime to digest all this extra calorie food. I am sluggish. I am running a fever, and thinking I may have the flu; I'm only fooling myself.
I'm looking forward to being well again to go to the gym, and get back that wonderful energy of last week. Amazing what a three day binge can do! Eh?! Last week, I treated myself to a manicure, pedicure and a new hair cut. I felt so great in those 'new' jeans. I started to feel like my beautiful self again. I'm still on the wagon, even if I took a little detour. I've always said; "part of the journey is falling off and getting back on again".
I want to thank all my fellow bloggers for their love and support both public and private. Joania! You are amazing girl...I'm honoured to be in your company! 266...I love your blog and look forward to reading more about your journey too!
Lastly, the other night Tony looked at me and said: "wow, you are so beautiful...you glow!" That makes the journey so worthwhile! :>
Sometimes in life, we need to take a detour just to appreciate the path we are meant to take.
Take care of yourself, and be well!
Kimmy
Monday, October 12, 2009
Gratitude on Thanksgiving
I am so blessed, and for that I am
great full (grateful)!
Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!
Whew! Is it Tuesday Yet?
So much to be thankful, and grateful for. It's been a whirlwind of a week-end. Nonetheless, I really feel amazing with my 20 lb loss. I feel so alive and rejuvinated again. I know I still have more to lose (60 lbs to go). But, I'm feeling like I've turned things around. I will blog about this tomorrow.
Saturday, I had lunch with a girlfriend of mine (in those skinnier size 14 jeans that had been in my closet with the tags for five years!), and I made some good choices. Dinner was a different story. Tony and I headed out to Fratelli's (one of my favourite restaurants besides Mamma Teresa's) We had wine, to celebrate our time together; cheers! Then it was all down hill from there. I will focus, however on the good choices. I chose not to have any bread. I went with whole wheat pasta instead of regular pasta with my fettuccine Alfredo and veal Marsala. Tony and I shared a tiramisu with our latte.
Sunday, we attended a royal Italian baptism (photos). We literally ate from 4 pm until 10 pm. It was delicious. Let's just say, I am stuffed with cannoli!
Today, I'm making my boys, turkey with all the trimmings, my famous homemade Caesar salad and strawberry cheesecake.
Thanksgiving!
I love Thanksgiving! It's one of my favourite holidays. Don't get me wrong, I am grateful everyday. Nonetheless, I love to reflect on this day, say a prayer to the heaven's and being truly grateful for all that I am graced with in my life. It's been a roller coaster of a year. With both my babies having surgery (Carmy, it looks like will be having another surgery (hopefully that's the issue with his lump on his testicle), in the near future), my father-in-law's massive heart attack and long road to recovery. In addition, having my hernia surgery and not being able to even get off the couch on Easter to make my family a decent Easter meal. We've come a long way...and for that I won't stop believing in the grace of life.
Today, I opened this blog to see that a fellow blogger Joania had given me an award. Wow! That made my day (and also gave me the kick to realize...ummm...tomorrow back to eating well, and working-out! :) ) Thank you, Joania! I am so appreciative of this award. If you want to be truly
inspired: http://joaniajourney.blogspot.com/.
Finally, if I could leave you on this beautiful Thanksgiving day with inspiration of my own. As I listen to "Don't Stop Believing" by Journey. Don't stop believing in yourself. Be the change you want to be. Eat well, be well, and take care of yourself. You are worthy of living your best life, and being your best. It's starts with you....now. Love yourself. Have gratitude and be kind.
You will love yourself more, and the world will love you back more in return.
May heaven shine down upon you, and guide you through the road ahead.
Thank you for reading my blog, and following my journey.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Saturday, October 10, 2009
Week 16!!!!
Kim: - 1 lb
Tony: -2 lbs
N.B.:
I've hit a milestone!!! 20 lbs gone and only 10.1 pounds to onderland! In addition, I fit into a size 14 jean. I've had these brand new expensive jeans for over five years, they never fit. At one point, I had a six inch gap to reach the zipper. Yesterday, they slipped on like a glove!!
Friday, October 9, 2009
Dr.Oz, 100 lbs lost and the Plateau.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
We Did IT!!!
If any of you have never signed up or done the CIBC Run for the Cure, I urge you to sign-up today! I have never experienced anything like it. I am so proud of my boys, my niece Gabriella and my nephews Luca and Nico. We did it!
I will be very honest, I am not a morning person. Realizing that we had to be at the run site for 7 ish on a Sunday morning was not my cup of tea. Moreover, trying to convince my boys that they too would have to be up by 6 am, was not going to be easy. However, they were great about the entire thing when I told them, 'they'd be getting up for their Nanna's".
My hubby lost both his Moms' to Breast Cancer. His biological Mom, Caterina, passed away when he was 8 years old. He lost his step-mom, Esterina, a few years ago. So he had to re-live this horrible disease twice in his lifetime, losing two wonderful women.
So we woke-up Sunday morning to fog and rain. However, all the rain in the world would not prevent us from doing what we had to do that day. Looking back, I'm so glad we did. We decided to take the bus to the run site (great idea by the way!)...so here we were standing at the station waiting for the bus, when suddenly out of nowhere people starting to join us, all in the CIBC Run for the Cure hope tees. Seems we weren't the only one's with this great idea. Anyhow, our true moment of the cause came when a young father showed up with his two children. Written on the back of the man's tee was: "I'm running for my wife", on the boy's: "I'm running for my Mom" and the little girl's said: "I'm running for my Mommy". Everyone sorta looked at each other, running for our own loved one's and causes, however we all felt the emotion of the moment. With tears strolling down my face, I looked proudly at my fourteen year old who also had read the shirts...and we all glanced at each other knowing that this was the reason we were all doing the run. You could hear a pin drop. Everyone had tears streaming down their face. The clouds broke and the sun began to shine down upon us.
The poignant moments would continue as we boarded the bus. Here we were on a public transportation bus loaded with everyone running for the cure that day. It was just a sea of white tees with the breast cancer ribbon etched with the words "hope, espoir". Unbelievable! Every stop, after stop the people were lined up going to the run for the cure. It was stirring, moving and emotional. To be a part of it all...was such an amazing feeling!
Once we arrived at the run site, the energy of the moment was contagious. The adrenaline was rushing through us all as we made our way to the start line.
Through the line we could see the names, the causes and the reasons why people had chosen to walk/run. It was incredibily powerful, words cannot describe it. One guy did a portage and carried his canoe the entire 5 K with his loved one's names etched on the canoe. We also seen many survivors, and many woman currently battling the disease. It was poignant moment after poignant moment. It was an honour to walk 5 km with my boys amoung these heroes.
Together, Ottawa raised 1.5 million dollars. It was a day I will never forget. When I arrived home, my hubby kissed me and thanked me for doing this for his moms', it was my honour. Next year he vouched to walk with us all. Together, as a family...we will support the cure for this disease that has touched so many lives.
To leave you all on a happy note, I will post a few conversations I had with Carmelo along our 5 k walk. Diodato, Gabriella ran ahead of us! Luca and Nico joined in, but they ran too. So it was Carmy and I the whole way. He held my hand (rather squeezed) tightly for dear life...afraid to lose me in the thousands of walkers.
Of course, it took about fifteen minutes for us to go through the start line, as there was so many people.
Carmy- "...wow...are we done yet?"
Me- " Look up..." as I'm pointing to the start sign..."we are at the starting line now."
Carmy- "YOU've got to be KIIIIIIIIIDING meeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! How long is this walk anyhow?"
-------
Carmy- "OKAY! We've been walking for longer than 1 k...you said! It was to my school and back...I've now walked from my school back again ten times at LEAST!!!!!"
( We walked the 5 k...)
Oh...and upon seeing the men pulling the buggies...I guess in case someone is unable to finish.
Carmy- "hey...MOM>.>>>tell them I want a ride!"
Me- (trying to whisper) "Carmelooooo, those are for the people who are sick and cannot finish the walk"
Carmy- "EXAAAAAAAAACTLY!!! I AM SICK>>>I am finished...and I can't walk anymore...if he doesn't believe you...pull out five bucks and pay HIM!"
----------
Me- "Carmelo! I see the finish line"
Carmy- "Thank the LORD! I did it...I actually did it...okay...I'm doing this...I did it...yahoo for me...I did it."
Carmy- "hey MOM...can we do this every year?"
:>
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Time to Tighten the Belt: a Meeting with our Trainer
I spoke to Rob briefly about my frustrations with lack of weight loss compared to Tony. I know...I know...he's a man, he has more weight to lose blah, blah, blah. But, as my eight year old Carmelo would surely say if he was in my place; "come on fricken all ready!"
Here I am, eating my cereal with almond breeze, drinking one coffee a day with my stevia, making sure to drink all my water, having snacks, and eating my meals 4 hours apart and especially making sure not to eat before going to bed. I'm doing my cardio and adding in some yoga.
Tony is having his protein shake in the morning if I make it for him. Skipping lunch (that's right Rob! I'm outing him), having sweets at work, thanks to those sabotaging girls at work! Plus, only drinking a tad of water. NOT working-out. Having a crappy protein bar for "lunch". Plus, having a bowl of cereal at night with MILK!
The difference? Tony loses $@@@@ a zillion pounds....Kim? ...the scale decides to budge down a small notch!!! As Jillian would say on The Biggest Loser: "F@@@ing BULL@@T MAN!!!"
Okay, I'm finished venting. As Rob made something very clear to me (I heard ya Rob...loud and clear). I need to weight train! I repeat: I need to weight train!
As Rob explained (and I already knew this...but it selectively skipped my mind): Men naturally have more muscle, therefore when they eat right (apparently Tony is on the right track still) they lose weight faster and more efficiently. Woman are not as muscular, therefore MUST compensate by weight-training. Cardio is NOT enough. If I might add to Rob's thoughts on this, from a woman's perspective; woman are built to carry some fat and less muscle due to nature's way (pregnancy especially). That is why once a month when Auntie Rose pays her visit, we tend to gain a few pounds or not lose weight that week. It's the body's natural instinct to prepare in case of pregnancy.
I know I am 100% accountable for not doing my weight-training. After much reflection last night, I am one hundred percent committed to this weight loss journey. Rob has advised me to:
4x a week weight train
3x a week cardio (30 mins)
plus
yoga when possible.
I came up with a great solution. I brought up my mat, free weights, ball etc...from the cruddy basement (a bonus of having a brand new home) and placed them in the living room. Twenty or so minutes in the morning while my three year old has his breakfast is all it's going to take. I have no excuses other than I am the excuse. I have also added a new side page detailing my work-out calendar so that I can be held accountable for not working-out (feel free to kick me when I'm not keeping up!) It begins today!