BLAHHHHHH!!!!!
I finally caved, gave my rings to my hubby and had him bring them to the jewelers to have them re-sized. I had been hinting for so long, but deep down I didn't want them sized up. However, after nearly five years of being seen as a 'single Mom', it was time for my beautiful rings to be put back on. So Tony mentioned it again and offered to bring them in...and I handed him the platinum.
I'll be very honest, because that is what my blog is intended for: raw truth. After he left, I laid on my bed and cried. It was one of my long time goals; to have my rings fit me again. But, let's be honest...after five years, my diamonds are made to be worn, and not stored in a safe. It is what it is...and chocolate is my ENEMY!
Nonetheless, don't be fooled...I'm back to smiling (on the outside anyhow!).
The Universe never let's me down for too long though...lol (A Surprise Diamond upgrade would make me feel WAY better...!)
Nevertheless, I attended an open house at my son's school yesterday, a woman from my son's class came up to me randomly and thanked me for this blog. Cheers to you..."P's Mom". She said to me: "a woman I know well, recommended your blog to me to read about your struggle ( that's for sure!) with weight loss and how inspiring you are...I recognized it as being you when I read about Carmelo (the one and only!)...your blog is a wonderful read and such an inspiration (really?!)".
Yes, I do write to de-stress myself. Writing is extremely therapeutic for me. In addition, my wish is to inspire others because we all struggle with our body image, our family responsibilities, our marriages, our journeys, and with life in general. I love to share, learn and hearten. In return, I am the one that is inspired. Thank you!
So what have I been doing as of late? RUNNING!!! Fat girl runs! ha ha ha ( I know, not supposed to say that...!) I ran 3.5 km the other day on my treadmill and it felt AMAZING! I love running (am I trying to run from something?!). Then my sister came for a random visit...and my work-outs stopped and eating began. Gosh, I am so an emotional eater. HOWEVER, I was more controlled.
I am more in control of my eating because I am reading a FANTASTIC book. I have recommend it before, now I HIGHLY recommend it.
"Women Food and God" by Geneen Roth
I am reading it slowly, and doing some internal cleansing. I have to say, that it's like peeling an onion layer by layer. Years, and years of emotional baggage and stuff. The AHA moments are striking faster than I can read the words. More importantly, I have changed the way I view food, and the way I eat. It's very difficult to explain in words. But, I do know that I feel so FREE. I am so liberated, and by that I do not mean that I am gorging myself with food with a 'who cares attitude'. Not at all, it's like a huge grey cloud that has been hanging over me since I was 10 and realized I was chubby (thanks to my grandmother!) The grey cloud titled "DIET" is gone. When I eat, I have no guilt, and don't struggle. I ended a war with food, and all that is associated with it. Surprisingly, I am making great choices, drinking water and treating my body well. I appreciate my body more, and look at myself in a whole new light (aside from the rings incident...lol). It's like these chains that have been choking me for so many years are gone. I can breathe. I cannot emphasize enough about this book. There is something to it...and it's not a religious book at all. Nonetheless, run out and buy it!
You know there is something to be said for letting go. It is such a liberating feeling. Amazing things happen when you let go. I have found a new strength within me (along with a challenge/competition and a Starbucks win...with my friend C (who's a HUGE inspiration)! Part of that was also handing my rings over to be fitted. I am more than diamond rings that I wore when I lost 100 lbs, had to take them off when I gained it back and hoping to lose it again to re-wear them. So I let that go too (with a few tears...)
I hope you will treat yourself to the book, and experience the same enlightening growth that I am experiencing.
Be well (and go get the book!),
Showing posts with label 37 in the 100's. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 37 in the 100's. Show all posts
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Thursday, January 28, 2010
No Excuses...Really!
I've been working my butt-off, well not really because apparently: it's still there!
The past two weeks, I have had no excuses to work-out. Really! My father-in-law had a full-time Nanny living with him, to help with his recovery from him massive coronary. Every winter, he ventures off to Florida. He has been doing so for the last fifteen years. To change that...would be devastating. However, being as the young woman had only been in Canada for less than a year, her visa application to visit the U.S. was denied. My father-in-law chose to leave anyway.
So for the first month, she stayed with my brother-in-law's family. Last week, she came to our house. At first, I will admit...I wasn't crazy about the whole idea. I'm the type of person who loves, LOVES her time alone. I spent most of my childhood growing-up alone, so that is a way of life for me. Besides, my home is already always coming and going with people. So I cherish the quiet time.
They say "blessings come in all sorts of disguises". I have to say that I was very wrong and 'crazy'. I mean, who wouldn't want a Nanny in their home, helping them?! With someone POWER CLEANING my home, and mending to my children (however, that task I still do mostly myself), I really had no excuses. I decided that if there was ever a time to get back in a routine of working-out...now was it. If I couldn't motivate myself to train, exercise now...I never will.
In addition, I read an article by Oprah (love her wisdom) that truly resonated with me. Oprah was talking about her goals to herself last year, to work-out more and eat better. She affirms that she 'hates' working-out. Who doesn't? Anyhow, she realized that by calling it "working-out", it was actually putting a negative twist to exercise. She has now changed the way she views 'working-out' by calling it: "honoring her body". So true!
I'm happy to report that I've stayed true to myself. I've trained and honoured my body a lot these past two weeks. I've even ran on the treadmill in the morning instead of going back to bed! The result? I feel amazing....again! I've lost three (3) pounds.
I'm counting down to my goal: February 22.
The universe has offered me a gift, that I really can't pass up and must take full advantage of.
I'm off to honour my body and myself...
Have a great day everyone!
xox
Kimmy
The past two weeks, I have had no excuses to work-out. Really! My father-in-law had a full-time Nanny living with him, to help with his recovery from him massive coronary. Every winter, he ventures off to Florida. He has been doing so for the last fifteen years. To change that...would be devastating. However, being as the young woman had only been in Canada for less than a year, her visa application to visit the U.S. was denied. My father-in-law chose to leave anyway.
So for the first month, she stayed with my brother-in-law's family. Last week, she came to our house. At first, I will admit...I wasn't crazy about the whole idea. I'm the type of person who loves, LOVES her time alone. I spent most of my childhood growing-up alone, so that is a way of life for me. Besides, my home is already always coming and going with people. So I cherish the quiet time.
They say "blessings come in all sorts of disguises". I have to say that I was very wrong and 'crazy'. I mean, who wouldn't want a Nanny in their home, helping them?! With someone POWER CLEANING my home, and mending to my children (however, that task I still do mostly myself), I really had no excuses. I decided that if there was ever a time to get back in a routine of working-out...now was it. If I couldn't motivate myself to train, exercise now...I never will.
In addition, I read an article by Oprah (love her wisdom) that truly resonated with me. Oprah was talking about her goals to herself last year, to work-out more and eat better. She affirms that she 'hates' working-out. Who doesn't? Anyhow, she realized that by calling it "working-out", it was actually putting a negative twist to exercise. She has now changed the way she views 'working-out' by calling it: "honoring her body". So true!
I'm happy to report that I've stayed true to myself. I've trained and honoured my body a lot these past two weeks. I've even ran on the treadmill in the morning instead of going back to bed! The result? I feel amazing....again! I've lost three (3) pounds.
I'm counting down to my goal: February 22.
The universe has offered me a gift, that I really can't pass up and must take full advantage of.
I'm off to honour my body and myself...
Have a great day everyone!
xox
Kimmy
Saturday, January 9, 2010
I'm BAAAAAAAAAACK!
It's a whole new year, a time to re-discover ourselves, out with the old, in with the new...
Like everyone else, the holidays are an extremely busy time, and we set ourselves aside, and go with the flow. After two weeks, of guests, entertaining, eating, eating and more eating, Tony and I set January 4 as our 'back on track' date.
Come the end of the year, we both realized we had been starting to feel like 'crap' again. All this eating, and drinking had caught up to us. I noticed that I wasn't sleeping well, and my body was achy all day. In addition, I had no energy and had cravings all day long. Tony noticed that his persistent back problem was ten fold, and that he was more irritable. We both looked forward to eating well, and working-out again. Date set: Monday, January 4.
I woke-up Monday morning feeling awful. I was running a fever, had a headache and a soar throat. I noticed that this was my first 'sick' day in a long time...probably since I started eating better. Obviously, the holiday's had finally caught up to me. "Great, why does my body insist on sabotaging me?"
As though it had heard me a little voice inside me replied: "your body tried it's best to sustain you through all of the craziness that has been around you, on top of that...you have nourished it with nothing 'good', you haven't worked-out, you haven't hydrated your body...what do you expect?!"
Very true! However, there is always more than meets the eye. Today, my sister was expected to arrive. Starting to eat better, train etc...with her around is a challenge to say the least. No disrespect to her at all, and I love her very much. But, this is the woman who once sat on a couch watching me run on the treadmill while she ate a bag of chips, drank a soda and said: "wtf do you do that shit for?!" Another time she came down to watch me work-out and actually fell asleep! She may be a good cook and all that...but healthy lifestyle she ain't! She hardly ever eats her cooking (ummm...) and loves to eat 'junk'. So trying to eat healthy with her around just adds to the stress of being sick, getting back to routine and all that. Still such is life, and in times like that I have learned that survival is best. Just getting through it all and doing the best you can sometimes means success.
In she came like a hurricane with her chips, her cheesies, her chocolate bars, her Pepsi, her butter shortbread cookies, her homemade perogies, chicken pot pies, meat pies and cakes! Yiiiiiiiiiiiiikes!
Nonetheless, I wasn't going to let it get the best of me. Even though my fever was wearing me down, I still attended my core circuit training session. I must admit that it felt pretty great to get back on track again. I wanted so much to get back on track this week...
Unfortunately, the rest of the week was a void. By Tuesday, my body was beat and the cold had overtaken me. I decided to try my best to eat well, avoid the junk food and start back strong Monday. Per contra, I did cave a little, I had some delicious perogies ( I mean you can't pass those up!), and a shortbread cookie or two. But, I was controlled and didn't go overboard like I would of in the past under the influence of my sister.
My body is now relieved of temptations as my sister has now gone back home, and the house is back to normal. I know with Tony and myself: we CANNOT have any 'junk' food in the house. If it's here, we'll eat it. So out with that too. Furthermore, we watched the season premiere of "The Biggest Loser" (great way to be inspired), and both decided that our healthy journeys' must continue.
I weighed myself this morning, and my body has been good to me. I have gained maybe (give or take) 3lbs or so. I am at 210 lbs. Honestly, I'm happy with that. I didn't gain the usual 7 lbs that most gain over the holidays. So I must look on the bright side to all this. I had a wonderful holiday season, I enjoyed myself immensly, even my visit with my sister, but now it's time to get down to business.
What better way to get on track, but to set a goal. This year promises to be an exciting year. My 37th birthday is around the corner. I love, love my birthday (hey, if I don't like my birthday than who will?! :>). What better gift to give myself than the gift of health! My birthday is February 22nd, so I have six weeks to get to my goal of 199lbs. That is six weeks to lose 11 lbs. I'm going to work hard and do it! No excuses...I'm starting year 37 in the 100 club!
Now hopefully...my sister won't be coming to visit anytime soon, and I'll be all set!
Set your short term goal and get to it...out with the old and in with the new!
Kimmy
Like everyone else, the holidays are an extremely busy time, and we set ourselves aside, and go with the flow. After two weeks, of guests, entertaining, eating, eating and more eating, Tony and I set January 4 as our 'back on track' date.
Come the end of the year, we both realized we had been starting to feel like 'crap' again. All this eating, and drinking had caught up to us. I noticed that I wasn't sleeping well, and my body was achy all day. In addition, I had no energy and had cravings all day long. Tony noticed that his persistent back problem was ten fold, and that he was more irritable. We both looked forward to eating well, and working-out again. Date set: Monday, January 4.
I woke-up Monday morning feeling awful. I was running a fever, had a headache and a soar throat. I noticed that this was my first 'sick' day in a long time...probably since I started eating better. Obviously, the holiday's had finally caught up to me. "Great, why does my body insist on sabotaging me?"
As though it had heard me a little voice inside me replied: "your body tried it's best to sustain you through all of the craziness that has been around you, on top of that...you have nourished it with nothing 'good', you haven't worked-out, you haven't hydrated your body...what do you expect?!"
Very true! However, there is always more than meets the eye. Today, my sister was expected to arrive. Starting to eat better, train etc...with her around is a challenge to say the least. No disrespect to her at all, and I love her very much. But, this is the woman who once sat on a couch watching me run on the treadmill while she ate a bag of chips, drank a soda and said: "wtf do you do that shit for?!" Another time she came down to watch me work-out and actually fell asleep! She may be a good cook and all that...but healthy lifestyle she ain't! She hardly ever eats her cooking (ummm...) and loves to eat 'junk'. So trying to eat healthy with her around just adds to the stress of being sick, getting back to routine and all that. Still such is life, and in times like that I have learned that survival is best. Just getting through it all and doing the best you can sometimes means success.
In she came like a hurricane with her chips, her cheesies, her chocolate bars, her Pepsi, her butter shortbread cookies, her homemade perogies, chicken pot pies, meat pies and cakes! Yiiiiiiiiiiiiikes!
Nonetheless, I wasn't going to let it get the best of me. Even though my fever was wearing me down, I still attended my core circuit training session. I must admit that it felt pretty great to get back on track again. I wanted so much to get back on track this week...
Unfortunately, the rest of the week was a void. By Tuesday, my body was beat and the cold had overtaken me. I decided to try my best to eat well, avoid the junk food and start back strong Monday. Per contra, I did cave a little, I had some delicious perogies ( I mean you can't pass those up!), and a shortbread cookie or two. But, I was controlled and didn't go overboard like I would of in the past under the influence of my sister.
My body is now relieved of temptations as my sister has now gone back home, and the house is back to normal. I know with Tony and myself: we CANNOT have any 'junk' food in the house. If it's here, we'll eat it. So out with that too. Furthermore, we watched the season premiere of "The Biggest Loser" (great way to be inspired), and both decided that our healthy journeys' must continue.
I weighed myself this morning, and my body has been good to me. I have gained maybe (give or take) 3lbs or so. I am at 210 lbs. Honestly, I'm happy with that. I didn't gain the usual 7 lbs that most gain over the holidays. So I must look on the bright side to all this. I had a wonderful holiday season, I enjoyed myself immensly, even my visit with my sister, but now it's time to get down to business.
What better way to get on track, but to set a goal. This year promises to be an exciting year. My 37th birthday is around the corner. I love, love my birthday (hey, if I don't like my birthday than who will?! :>). What better gift to give myself than the gift of health! My birthday is February 22nd, so I have six weeks to get to my goal of 199lbs. That is six weeks to lose 11 lbs. I'm going to work hard and do it! No excuses...I'm starting year 37 in the 100 club!
Now hopefully...my sister won't be coming to visit anytime soon, and I'll be all set!
Set your short term goal and get to it...out with the old and in with the new!
Kimmy
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